Since this is Houston it's hot until well into October. I don't mean Indian Summer hot. I mean legit over 90s sweat dripping down your back hot. Not ideal for eating a burger outdoors. Sparkle burger is about as big as my office with only outdoor seating. After a very thorough discussion on the pros and cons of eating in the car, Twist, Ducky Momo and I knew we had to bide our time for cooler weather. Tuesday the waiting was rewarded with a glorious sunny day in the low 80s. We rejoiced in our good fortune but our hopes were cruelly dashed when it was learned Ducky Momo could not attend in person. He would have to experience by proxy and get takeout. That left Twist and I to take on Sparkle Burger with no elder statesmen.
First. Let me just say nearly everything about Sparkle Burger is crazy, starting with its name. Really I only say that because the only businesses I know of named Sparkle are car washes. It doesn't sound very burger-y to me. Next is the size of the burger. For $4 it's got to be bumping up on 1/2 a pound. The picture doesn't do it justice. It is ginormous. I couldn't even eat half of it. Not to mention the inelegant shape of my patty which had me cracking up. I will call it Frankenburger.
Fries also HUGE. So big you can't even call it a steak fry. Just giant potato wedges. The eating area was also interesting. Dubbed the Sparkle Chill Spot it was a small wrought iron fenced-in area of misshapen iron picnic and patio tables on the side of the building in the parking lot. The best part about it was the crumpled up astro turf. It looked my 2-yr old had come by and dropped her blanket then someone decided to put tables on top of it. Lemonade was homemade which is always a plus. On the down side I think the lemonade was a bag of sugar in a pitcher of water with a shot of lemon. The sugar coma hit me around 2.
Don't misunderstand my calling it crazy. By crazy in this case, I mean crazy-awesome. Twist and I decided sparkle burger was more an overall experience vs. just looking for a good burger. My burger was good by the way. Fresh bun, nicely seasoned meat. I'll prob find out later it was soylent green, but whatever. Until I do, I would go back. Tots on the other hand were just meh. They tasted like when you get some tots and try to save them and put them in the microwave the next just to be disappointed b/c now they are kind of soggy.
Rookie error we made was not calling ahead. We had to wait 25 min for our order bc of the stream of people coming through to pick up. And there were a lot of people coming to pick up. We put in our order for Ducky Momo and it was ready by the time we finished eating. He wasn't very awed by his giant burger patty, but then he was at his desk and missed all the ambience.
Sparkle Burger gets a 4 and a recommended. We will be going back. I can't ignore the sheer quantity of items on its menu. And, they serve breakfast. Giddy up!
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